Tell me Lies, Tell Me Lies, Tell me sweet little lies

Old blog from my Facebook site. Well, not that old but still from late last year. I'll be posting some "older" notes from there.



(wikipedia) INTEGRITY is consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations and outcome. Integrity may be seen as the quality of having a sense of honesty and truthfulness in regard to the motivations for one's actions.


Lies, tell me lies, tell me sweet little (white) lies.
Sunday Chris and I were talking and I was trying to guess what he bought me for Christmas. (Yes I know Christmas is a long way off but we both shop early…) After 30 minutes of playfully trying to guess, anything from the latest Wheel of Time book to a trip to Disney World, I gave up. He then told me that I had guessed something for Christmas and something for my birthday. But I had thrown out so many things I would never be able to narrow it down. So white lies can sometimes be beneficial. If I did guess and he told me 'yes, that’s it' instead of 'nope, sorry, guess again' I’d no longer be surprised. I think perhaps sometimes white lies are spoken with love. That’s the kind that won’t hurt anyone and help a positive outcome.
Sadly, though there are few lies in this world that are harmless.

Liar. You stupid selfish liar.
Or at least that’s what I wanted to say. Sitting in the car recently I was told about a conversation where a lie was told to make Chris and I out to be scapegoats. I was outraged and luckily I wasn’t driving. I was blinded temporarily by anger. This person who told the lie is notorious for doing things like that so I shouldn’t have been surprised. Over the years I had blown things off he said and did. However previously it wasn’t such a public lie to so many people. The lie was placed on us simply because we weren’t there at the time to stand up for ourselves. So it was a lie of convenience. But much like anything of convenience there is a price to pay. Now my trust in him is diminished enough that I’m thinking of saying no next time he asks for help. Which of course will further aggravate the person into lying more I’m sure. It’s a vicious circle.

I know it’s not easy to say I was wrong but is it really easier to lie?
Everyone and I mean everyone lies at one time or another. But what makes us lie so much? We know we’ve done wrong, we know we should fess up. As my brother says it’s easier to tell the truth instead of trying to remember the web of lies you’ve woven. Because it really is an intricate web of lies you have to remember. Snowball effect, one lie leads to another. So to lie, you’d better have a great memory. Or at least a better memory than the person you’re lying to. At what point does the web break under the weight of the lies and you go spiraling down into trouble?

House of cards
Well, like I said everyone lies at one point or another. Lies can be told to impress people, helping us to better our situation however falsely. But generally they are used to keep you out of trouble. Those lies are made to alleviate our guilt about something we’ve done. Although guilt is a sounding alarm meant to fend off things such as lying its often too late. Once the lie is told it’s even harder to admit to telling a lie.

So how does it feel to be lied to? To have someone straight faced stand there and lie? I think in the story above it was easy because we weren’t there. But when you are faced with the person knowing you have lied what then? When we find out someone has lied to us or led us to believe something untrue we lose respect and trust in that person. Perhaps we don’t know we’ve lost those things but we have. I know myself most times I don’t say anything if I find out someone has lied to me. But I’m more cautious to believe them after that. Something is broken when that happens and is lost.
Trust is like a house of cards, it takes a long time to build up but when the foundation is shaken even just a little-everything falls apart.

Are lies worth the sin committed when losing so much?